Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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