1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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