NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
