4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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