If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Randomize
