Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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