i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize