i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize