so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize
