hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
