Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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