also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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