He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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