She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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