did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize