god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
