The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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