video games are the ultimate cock blocker
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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