ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Randomize
