I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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