After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize