I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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