I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
