This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
