if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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