it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
