Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
