I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize