Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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