I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
50% drunk capacity currently
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize