It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
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