The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
