btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...