Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
