I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
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