I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
You were trust falling into bushes
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
