Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
