Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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