All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Randomize