Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
