Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Randomize
