Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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