dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
