so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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