; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
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