Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
