He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
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just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
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Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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