Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
