Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
