Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize