That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
